Autism Awareness Month

UPDATE: Jamberry launched a BRAND NEW Autism Awareness wrap for 2015 TODAY!!! It's GORGEOUS! 

Autism Awareness: Jamberry donates $2.00 for every sheet of charity nail wraps purchased to the Autism Society of America. 

I'm excited to launch a new section in my Jamberry business - fundraisers!

This month I will have a party open all month in support of Autism Awareness. A portion of all party proceeds will go straight to the Autism Society of America.

Want free tax and shipping? I have selected seven adorable wraps that look gorgeous together and if you submit your order using this form I will cover your tax AND shipping, all month!

Do you have a charity or organization you'd like to raise money for? I would love to help you support that mission through Jamberry! Email me and we can make it happen.

Don't have a charity to support but want to earn free wraps? Every ten wraps sold in a party earns the hostess a FREE sheet, so let's talk if you'd like to start earning Pinterest-worthy nails for free!

These are a few of my favorite combos of my featured wraps for April:

All images sourced from Instagram using the official Jamberry hashtags (#autismawarenessjn, #prepschooljn, #puppylovejn, #sunnylotusjn)

What charity would you like to help support?

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I Chose Me.

This blog post has been a long time coming.

I wasn't sure how much or how little I wanted to share about the last few weeks of my life. Usually this blog is a tell-all for most things "Jess" but a friend reminded me that it's okay to keep some things private and I have to say, I agree in this instance.

For all involved, it's been a very tumultuous few weeks. Particularly for me. I've been through more emotional and mental strain in Feb of 2015 than ever in my life and I hit the lowest, darkest place I've ever been.

What's important now, is that of all the choices I could have made, the choice I did make was for me. I chose me. 

Starting today, I am a full time mom. That's all. I'm finally just a mom.

That's not to say that I don't plan to pursue other endeavors, because I do and it is important to me that I contribute to my family. However, for the first time in a long time I feel like myself again. I feel like Jess. Happy, satisfied, excitable, positively bubbly, overwhelmingly friendly....Jess. I'm not faking it anymore. I'm not pretending and putting on my happy face to make the outside world think all is well. I'm really feeling like myself again.

I finally feel like making mini-muffins for the neighbors and dropping them off, just because.

I finally feel like going for a walk and exercising my body and mind again.

I finally feel like doing all I can to stretch a dollar or a meal again (which, naturally with a change of income will come a change of lifestyle so that urge is coming at the right time!)

So, thank you for bearing with me the last few weeks and sticking around even though all you've had to read most of the time were my bitty little pregnancy updates.

Thank you for being loyal and kind and caring even though so many of you I have never met.

And thank you for continuing to read. Because coming up I aim to have a plethora of new crafts for moms and for toddlers, design for adult spaces and children's spaces and recipes of course that the whole family will appreciate and enjoy; even some that you can create together!

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One Hour

Yesterday my amazing sitter was here for the morning and spent her time spoiling LW and her son. They colored, crafted, snacked, I'm sure had the usual dance party, read books, played trains...the whole nine yards. So naturally when I had to ask her to stay an extra hour because I forgot to check my conference call schedule prior to having her arrive, I felt really guilty.

She agreed to stay and never bat an eye at my request. That extra hour happened to roll over lunch time, so she also fed her son and mine. I forgot to offer her food for her own lunch.

That one hour changed my attitude for the day. For once, I was able to spend my lunch hour snuggling my child. I could read him a book, watch part of a show and we could cook a soup for dinner together.

I didn't have to make him lunch, or clean up after him or fight to count how many bites he'd taken while I watched the clock to make sure I didn't go over my allotted hour break.

LW spent the entire morning playing, so when it was time for his nap, he just fell asleep without fighting me. I didn't have to take him on a drive in the car or listen to him stomp around his room creating mass destruction for an hour. He just laid down, and went to sleep.

Since I'd already cooked dinner, after work I took our dog to the vet without feeling rushed. I came home and we ate at our leisure...because dinner was ready when we were. Then, I cleaned up and did the dishes from the whole day (a feat that is NEVER done at night, always begrudgingly in the morning before 8am).

Because I had one hour so unselfishly given to me during the work day, I was able to mop my floors that night. Something that (sorry Mom) I hadn't done yet this year. I also folded a mountain of laundry, which may even get put away this week. I did this while LW watched Frozen for the 8,000th time but I didn't feel guilty because I knew he had spent his day playing or peacefully napping.

One hour gave me the relaxation after bedtime to sit and have a conversation with my husband and our company for the evening, a friend who was in from out of town, without eyeing the dishes that hadn't been washed or the laundry that hadn't been folded. Because I'd already done both!!

Hiring someone to come and help me during the day has done wonders for my mentality.

Because of the unselfishness of the person I chose to help me, I am able to be more productive and relax more often.

Whoever your care giver, hug them. Buy them a Starbucks. Remember to offer them lunch. I had no idea the peace of mind an hour would give me.

To our caregiver: As I have said before, we are blessed to have you...and I cannot say thank you enough. Also, I'm really sorry I forgot to offer you lunch. Next time, just eat my food!!! All of it! Any of it!! 

This also goes for Grandmas and Grandpas who spend their days off chasing our wild little beast, changing diapers, battling tantrums, combating naps and wiping snotty noses. You already did your time by raising your own children and still you volunteer your time for your grandchild without a moment of hesitation. Thank you. We appreciate you more than you know.

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I Bit the Bullet: In-Home Child Care

Pregnancy is tiring. Working is tiring. Parenting is tiring. The triple-threat of all three at once every day became too much for me (as I'm sure you've noticed from my pathetic number of blog posts for the last...year).

After questioning whether I really needed help or not (the answer has always been yes, I've just been too stubborn to admit it), Hubs and I decided it was time we hired some help for me during the week.

I knew it was time because if I looked at myself from an outside perspective, I was embarrassed at how I started to parent. More of my day was spent pushing my son away from me than scooping him up for snuggles. I said, "Just go watch TV" more times in an 8 hour work day than I could count. And when TV didn't do it, Frozen and a bucket of animal crackers did. And I yelled. OH did I yell. Who was I?! This is NOT the mom I want to be. This is NOT the way I want my son to remember his childhood. "Yeah, my mom stayed home but she worked, so she never really paid any attention to us". Nuh-uh. No way. Time for reinforcements.

Now, I'm not saying that things will be perfect now because I have a three hour a week break, but you can believe it's already made a difference in my mentality. Just KNOWING for the last week that help was expected today has changed my mood and increased my patience.

A great friend of mine is a SAHM with a son 3 weeks older than LW and has offered to watch LW countless times for me to give me a break so I can concentrate more thoroughly on work. Then her offers to watch him became a subtle, "You know, I'm thinking of starting to nanny...just a few hours a week..." and finally I hit a wall last week and said, "That's it! I'm doing it. I'm hiring her to come save me."

For us, I believe it's truly the perfect blend. I still work from home, I don't have to go anywhere to drop LW off. He gets a playmate for three hours a week. She gets out of her house for a change-of-pace plus makes a little money and I get to work. Blissful, uninterrupted, diaper change-less work for three. straight. hours. THAT doesn't even include nap time, which can be up to FOUR additional hours! I mean, that is best-case scenario but THE POSSIBILITY IS REAL.

Many moms have teased me (in good fun, I know) that I would be giving up something by getting help, and now is the time to "be" with my child because he won't be this young again. I'll "never get this time back". Twenty months ago, I would have agreed with them. However at this stage in our financial life the reality is, I need to do great work and continue earning for our family as long as I can. And to do that, I need help being a mom. I need a few little slivers of time to not be bothered and hunker down to really, truly, invest in myself and my job.

I can be on conference calls anywhere. I can check email, read articles, share stories, respond to messages and notifications all in my extra nuggets of time throughout the work day when I AM interrupted without it affecting my workflow. But sometimes I just need to not be bothered and those times are getting harder and harder to come by with Mr. Independent romping through my house.

I feel so relieved just from one day of having help. Not to mention, it was wonderful to be able to hear LW giggling and laughing with a friend all morning while they played trains and had a dance party. I also have the comfort of knowing LW is in exceptional hands because this friend parents the same way Hubs and I parent. Plus, I know LW is getting snacks and beverages I would give him, because he's home. I never have the question of "I wonder what he ate this morning..." (other than the obvious question mark of occasional bits of kibble, cat hair and laundry lint which no one can prevent at this point).

So, I am missing out on three hours a week with my son in addition to the ten hours once a week I have to go into the office for the day. But, I feel like we are both gaining so much from the experience already that I don't have a shred of regret. Not one shred.

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Pregnancy: 16 Week Update

Sorry my blog posts have only been pregnancy related lately. It's a struggle for me to find the balance between exhaustion, working enough, parenting enough, cleaning enough, cooking enough, blogging enough...you get the picture. 

How far along? 16 Weeks

Size of Baby:  Avocado! This happens to be a staple snack for LW and I LOVE guacamole, so I haven't seemed to have an issue consuming or cutting up avos this week :) Thank goodness. 

Weight Gain: Still no clue. Two more weeks until I weigh in again! 

Nursery:  My window treatment obsession has been curbed! HOORAY! Finally. I was nearly losing sleep over the fact that we would miss the last available blinds I liked at Bed Bath & Beyond before they were sold out (discontinued model) so on New Year's Day Hubs and I trekked out to the store with LW and bought the last two. I am so relieved. 

Also, I put my nesting to good use by updating LW's "big boy room" windows: 

He isn't in the twin bed yet, but I already feel like his room is so grown up with the window treatments and new throw (both of which have helped us with nap time - story for another post perhaps). 

Movement: With LW I feel like from 10 weeks on he was just running laps. I know it's normal to not feel movement at all until 18 or so weeks, but this baby is really a snoozer. I'm not sure if it's a cause for concern, or if it's because I am so busy I don't stop to think and feel and connect with him (queue Mom guilt) or if it's just too early...or if he's truly just a lazy bum! In the ultrasounds I've had so far the tech has had to jostle him pretty firmly to get him to cooperate or move at all and even then he gave a casual hand gesture or slow-motion kick and went back to napping. Maybe he will be like that in real life....since we all know in real life Billy DOES just run laps, constantly. A mom can dream, ya know. 

Symptoms:  I'm fighting the tail end of an annoying cold that just won't die...so my nose is stuffy a lot. And I'm sure that isn't being helped by the pregnancy at all. Otherwise, I'm suddenly very hungry. And could eat all. the. food. 

Cravings:  Chocolate cake glazed doughnuts. Ohhh baby. I tried getting sour cream doughnut holes at the grocery store and that did not hit the spot so on our way to church on Sunday Hubs stopped and got me one of the delicious doughnuts I've been craving. Ohhhhh it made me so very very happy. 

Looking forward to: Our ultrasound in two weeks! Hubs took the day off of work and I am already looking forward to having another very long weekend with him home to help (and snuggle). 

Things I can't get off my mind: Since we took care of my blinds crisis and Hubs got me a doughnut, I'm happy as a clam! I'm feeling a slight nag from my subconscious about wanting to find a care option for LW a few days a week...and then wondering what I will do when Mo arrives...how will I manage...but I'm doing my best to just smash those nagging thoughts right back down to where they came from and try to enjoy every minute I can with LW as we are still just the two of us during the work day and enjoy the pregnancy with Mo as much as possible. 

Every day I feel like I hit a near-breaking point and wonder, "HOW can I do this?! WHY do I do this!? WHEN will it get better?!!" and I somehow seem to keep pushing through, persevering, and everything is fine. By the end of the work day I've always done what I needed to do, dinner is ready to start, and I can start looking forward to Hubs coming home to help with everything. Somehow, every day....it just works. I am so thankful for that.

I have become addicted to Call the Midwife and seeing all of those natural deliveries and home births has made me start thinking, "Could I have this baby naturally? Do I think I could do it this time? Will this labor be different from the labor I experienced with LW?" Then, there was an episode with a placental abruption (as I had with LW) and it all came flooding back to me. The pain. The fear. The worry. The relief and comfort I felt from my epidural and knowing I had a team of tremendous doctors and nurses by my side...and immediately I thought, "Yes. An epidural it is. Unless God will have it differently, I will deliver this baby comfortably with a beautifully numbing epidural." because the moment I got it with LW, everything got so, so so much better. 

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Some Notes on Me Lately

Hi! I've been so busy lately I haven't been able to fill you in on much via blog - however I have been posting little nuggets on Instagram, so follow me there to stay in the loop! Here are some notes on my life lately:

I feel more at home in the new house than I have ever felt anywhere but my childhood home – actually, I feel more at home here now than I do at my childhood home. Maybe because Hubs grew up here and knows every finicky light switch, every creak in the floor and every stubborn door knob but maybe just because we know this is it. We've reached our final 'landing' place and we couldn't be happier. I absolutely love our new home.

Working full time from home with a toddler is hard. Like....HARD. But, every day I seem to find new tricks to make it a little better (like hiding grapes around the kitchen so I can work and he stays off my keyboard!). Toddlers are delicate because one day they hate watching TV, the next they will sit and watch a whole show. One day they love playing blocks and will stack/knock them down for an hour, the next they think blocks are stupid and cry if you suggest them to play with. I'm constantly changing and evolving as a mom just like LW is constantly changing and evolving as a boy! 

I have taken time for myself a lot lately because I have learned I really need it. One way is by putting new Jamberry Nails on every week. Last week I sported Midnight Celebration and this week I'm sporting Alphabet over Deep Sea (both discontinued). I feel so girly and fun when I have cute nails! It's like they belong on Pinterest all the time. I also got a massage this weekend. Whoa. 

Slowly but surely, Hubs and I have started to acquire pieces that will make this house 'our' style. For the first time ever we have matching bedside tables. I can't even begin to say how exciting THAT purchase was! Plus, at the same garage sale we scored a vintage, ornamental mirror for our entryway and a super cute bench for LW to sit at in our bedroom and look out the window, one of his favorite past times. I thought the blue color in the Greek key pattern on the bench would be close to the blue on our walls and it is nearly the exact shade. All four of these items (two tables, mirror and bench) were $40. We win! 

Oh, and window treatments!!! I scoured Bed, Bath & Beyond this weekend and came up with a winning combination that won't break the bank. I found the rod ($6) and valance ($4 on clearance) plus bought a set of honeycomb cordless blinds that are regularly $39.99 on clearance for $16.99 and I used a $5 coupon....That would mean I just dressed that whole window for roughly $22. Bang. I'll post another pic once Hubs hangs the blinds and when I know the size works, I will be going back to buy them hopefully for the all other windows we need blinds on! I knew I was hoarding those $5 coupons for a reason. 

As more pieces of the home come together, I will share more photos. For now...don't hold your breath for a "home tour" like the one on the old house because I just don't know if we will ever be "done" decorating this house! 

And, if any of you are in the Chicagoland area or know someone house hunting in the Northwest Suburbs of Chicago....please SHARE OUR HOUSE THAT IS FOR SALE. THAT is the real home-tour to see ;) 

In the coming weeks I hope to at least decorate the front of our home with festive fall items. Bales of straw, pumpkins, gourds, mums and the like. I follow John Colaneri on Instagram and not only do I want every beautiful accent in his home to be in my home, this weekend he and his wife decorated their front steps. Swoon! 

Here are a few other front steps that I love for fall...Happy Decorating! 

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