My Nursing Essentials

Nursing my second baby has been a completely different experience as nursing my first. There is a certain confidence that comes with nursing your second baby, I think. I'm much more comfortable nursing in public, or anywhere really, in front of anyone. A lot of that comfort comes from having the right "gear".

Since I know lots of mamas about to have their second or who just had their second and are exclusively nursing, I thought this post may be of use to a few of them. Here are my favorite nursing essentials this time around:

1) Bamboobies

I could say this over and over - these nursing pads are THE best. I leaked A LOT with LW and Mo in the beginning. Here and there I still get a little sore from some distracted nursing so I still take these out and use them with a little ointment, even now. They're definitely a must have from day one.

2) Gilligan & O'Malley Nursing Tanks

It takes a few weeks for your supply to regulate, which means early nursing breasts are just too big for fitted bras. Nursing tanks come into play and I basically lived in them for....a few months. Now my supply has regulated and I can wear bras I feel good in (stay tuned for that item). I still wear these tanks to bed every night - having proper nursing attire makes nursing even more enjoyable. I didn't have any for LW other than bras and wow is my experience more pleasant this time having clothes meant for nursing in. For whatever reason I prefer the Henley version of this tank top specifically. They just feel nicer than the standard version, to me.

3) Soma Nursing Bra

I'm not sure if Soma had the Full Coverage Contour Nursing Bra when I nursed LW but when I needed new nursing bras for Mo I bought one and I LOVE it. It feels like a "real" bra - full coverage and support - but you can nurse in it in a snap. It's wonderful. I also have a few of their Full Coverage Unlined Nursing Bras and I really like the feel of them, I just prefer the Contour model.

4) Undercover Mama Nursing Tank

They call this tank the "basic essentials" and that is the perfect name for it. When paired with your favorite nursing bra, this top is a slam dunk. It's fitted and slimming, nice and long and works with any clip style nursing bra. LOVE love love this tank. I only have one of them, but I could wear it every day.

5) Latched Mama Hoodie

This one I told you yesterday that Hubs got me for our 4 year anniversary. I had been following Latched Mama on Facebook for a while, always heard good things and even bought one as a gift, but never opened it to inspect before I wrapped it. W-O-W is this hoodie nice. Living in Chicago, the weather gets really dang cold and calls for loads of layers. This hoodie is pure perfection. It's fleece lined and crazy, ridiculous levels of soft and snuggly. I will be wearing it A LOT this winter and I think it looks sporty enough that I can keep wearing it beyond this winter, when I'm no longer nursing a babe.

Hopefully that helps some nursing or soon-to-be nursing mamas fill in their list for Santa ;-)

Did I miss anything? Tell me your essential nursing items in the comments on Facebook.

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So Darn Lucky

Knowing our family dynamic is going to change significantly in a few weeks with the arrival of Mo has been on my mind lately. I have been trying to be sure to give LW extra adventure and help him excel at every skill now while I have the time, because I know when Mo arrives I will be a human feed bag again and my patience for "adventure" in the mud or the dog dish will dwindle. 

But, LW isn't the only man in the house that I have been attentive to lately. Bringing a baby into the mix is going to take a lot from my husband too and having the groundwork to a strong, healthy relationship is important now more than ever. This article (http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/relationships/advice/a25665/habits-happy-couples/?src=spr_FBPAGE&spr_id=1443_161413181) gave me the warm and fuzzies because it reminded me how lucky we are. 

Yesterday Hubs and I went to the aquarium with some friends who are visiting from out of town. The whole drive down Hubs and I talked. It wasn't just "we should save this much money for this" or "we should remember to do that" typical chores talk, it was genuine, wonderful conversation. Moments like that remind me that we are so damn lucky. It is such a blessing to have a completely honest marriage. Even when he bugs me, I can tell him exactly what he did. I can talk about what bothers me and he is respectful of that. He listens. 

On the flip side, as a pregnant mom right now, I'm sure many of you understand when I say that I don't have the longest fuse. I'm not as patient as I normally am or as understanding at times...and Hubs doesn't have a problem giving me gentle reminders. He is sincere about it but he is honest and tells me when my attitude is getting out of line. 

I'm so thankful to have that kind of man in my life. I know we aren't perfect and marriage isn't always easy, but one thing I do know is we both work for it. We both do all we can to give the other what they need. And, we both do everything we can for our boys. It's true now before Mo is in our arms and will continue to be true when he is here and squealing, spitting and pooping everywhere.  

While many of you busily and excitedly prepare for a new arrival, be sure to take an assessment of the relationship you have with the man who helped put that baby in your belly. Because he is the one who will be up with you on sleepless nights. He will be the one you beg to hold the baby for five more minutes so you can shower. He will be the one who is your cheerleader to keep breastfeeding. To keep trying a new swaddle technique. To turn the house upside down trying to find the favorite paci. 

Build him up, because he gave you the most incredible gift in the world. He made you a mom....and you gave it right back by making him a dad. Give that man a smooch and remind him how special it is to have him in your life today and every day. 

I love you, Hubs! Thanks for being my main man. I can't wait to see what being a family of four is like with you.

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Someday List

My first few days as a SAHM were pretty surreal. The weather in Chicago went from winter to spring overnight, the air smelled cleaner, the house seemed bigger...everything really felt ideal.

And then reality hit.

Kidding, but really, there were a few days of "honeymoon" period where LW and I did everything and went everywhere and now things are settling into a nice little routine for us.

Every morning, we start by having breakfast together, followed by him watching some Daniel Tiger while I do the breakfast dishes and dinner dishes from the previous evening. Then I head upstairs to sneak a shower while he's still enthralled in Daniel. Around 9:30-10:00am we head to an open gym, library or friend's house many days during the week to blow off a little steam. He falls asleep on the way home, takes a solid nap and that's when I can do as I wish.

This is the "golden" time, as all moms know and understand. Nap time is the one quiet, blissful, beautiful time during the day where we can eat candy bars without hiding behind the pantry door or do our nails without also being a jungle gym.

Every day I have a list of things I plan to accomplish. I love having lists - even if I put things on it just to cross them off. I feel so accomplished watching my list dwindle.

In addition to my "Daily Chores" list, I now keep a "Someday List". This list is full of those tedious, seemingly impossible, challenge-packed tasks that when you realize they need to be done you chuckle to yourself and say "Someday". Someday. As in....never. Me telling myself "Someday" might as well be me telling myself "No chance in Hell I will ever actually do that".

WELL, I've actually started the list. AND I plan on doing the items that are on it! Because....if an item is on my list, I mean business. If I share mine...will you share yours?

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A Wild Weekend

The month of November has F-L-O-W-N!!!! Is it just me!? I don't think it is.

Hubs asked me last night while I was writing thank you cards to my Jamberry customers why I hadn't blogged and I said I guess I'm just not inspired enough to write right now.

He said "If this week wasn't something to blog about...then I don't know what is." Let me recap:

Thursday night: LW woke at 8:45 vomiting kielbasa EVERYWHERE. Hubs and I rush in, I handle LW, Hubs handles bedding/vomit/carpet and within 25 minutes, LW is back to sleep and Hubs and I can go downstairs.
9:30 Princess starts whining and acting up...sniffing ferociously at the basement door. I said "She has something....no....there is something ALIVE under that door that she has trapped there". Hubs goes to investigate. A mouse starts hopping down the stairs. Hubs gets his "mouse catcher" (a box from new blinds and a broom) and escorts the mouse to the far side of our property.
9:35 Princess still losing her mind... I say "Can you just go down there with her and see if there are more...?" Hubs opens the door and P runs to the bottom of the stairs and into LW's play area. Where Hubs finds another mouse. This time dead, and exploded...all over LW's toys. ACK. Hubs cleans up.
9:45 Princess AGAIN losing her mind and I'm about to lose mine. She's following something that appears to be in the ceiling and as I'm sufficiently getting more and more creeped out I look, and there is a wasp on the wall – what she was following. A wasp. In Chicago. In NOVEMBER. ?!!?! Hubs kills and disposes of wasp.
11:30 Hubs and I are finally nestling into bed, drifting off to sleep and I hear that horrible, terrible, awful sound, as clear as day. LW puking. Again. Repeat steps from earlier, this time even FASTER since we were expecting it. Clean up, bathe toddler, new jammies, clean sheets, scrub carpet, new blankets, rock, rock, snuggle snuggle, out like a light. 15 minutes. Can I just reiterate how horrible the smell of vomited kielbasa is? UGH. Really horrible.

Finally, we were able to go to sleep Thursday evening. Friday Hubs was off work so he ran all of our family errands while I worked. Friday evening we moved a family heirloom from my in-laws over to our house. A 1915 Victrola. We don't have many things in our new house yet, but we are acquiring cool things!

Friday night we designed and ordered our Christmas card. CHRISTMAS!! My FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR! Some of my friends have referred to me as a "real life Buddy the Elf" because I love Santa so much. And Christmas. And snow. I can't wait to share our card with you! But, it's no fair showing you before it mails ;) Plus, it's not even Thanksgiving. I have some respect, you know.

Saturday morning I woke up feeling like it was Christmas because it was the Old Navy cardholders Black Friday Sale. WAHOO!!!! I spent way more than I planned (shocker) but I FINALLY got some real pants that fit LW and I bought myself the most comfortable PJ pants on the planet. I've asked for 150 more pairs of them for Christmas.

I learned this weekend that Old Navy toddler 18-24m pants aren't as long as the "baby" 18-24 month pants. However, the toddler 18-24m pants have the zipper and button like real jeans, which helps TREMENDOUSLY in getting pants over a cloth booty. Plus, the toddler jeans come in skinny and WOW are they cute. We love Project Pomona pants but for $8/pair at Old Navy, I couldn't resist giving their jeans a shot to try with his cloth bottom.

Saturday evening we had a church pot luck and worship rather than having worship on Sunday morning so I made our favorite brisket recipe.

I usually must let it slow cook 8-10 hours because this time I only did 6 and it wasn't as tender as I like. BUT, the brisket was gone in a flash and I used the leftover BBQ sauce to make sloppy joe's on Sunday. YUM! Waste not, want not :)

For Christmas this year we have already finished our shopping for LW because he is getting the most tremendous Christmas gift ever. A SWING SET! He'll have things to "open" also, but a family member of a close friend offered us a deal we couldn't refuse on this beauty. It may not look like much now, but I can't wait to look out the window and see LW and his pals playing on it for years to come.

Finally, Sunday. We didn't have church in the morning so the plan was to "sleep in". Which, originally we laughed at the thought. "Sleep in" with an 18 month old?! HA! Well.... we've recently moved LW into a toddler bed and the beauty of that is that instead of crying when he wakes up, he gets out of bed and (typically) knocks on his door to let us know he's awake. Sunday morning he unplugged his monitor and proceeded to cruise his room. For I'm not sure how long....Hubs and I lazily opened our eyes and started chatting at 8:45am and looked at the clock. "OH NO IT'S ALMOST NINE". I leapt out of bed and ran to LW's room to make sure he was okay and sure enough, he was twirling and dancing around his room, jolly as you please. He looked up at me like, "Oh, hey! You're up!"

LW and I had a 2nd birthday party in the afternoon for a friend from the old neighborhood at this SUPER fun play spot very close to our house. If you're in the NW burbs - check out Kids Club Party & Fun! Apparently they have Groupons often and it was a FUNNNNN two hours!!

I love giving gifts that aren't toys and take a little creativity to construct. For our birthday boy friend, I built a gift basket full of all organic and gluten-free snacks! Birthday Boy's mom has Celiac's so I know diet is really important to her for her son. I had a BLAST constructing it and with a World Market coupon, it kept the gift totally within my "birthday gift" budget.

For some people on our lists that seem to have "everything", a gift basket full of treats they may not splurge on normally is a really fun and inventive gift. Hubs and I love giving baskets full of wine, cheese, crackers and sausage to his dad for Christmas every year. And every year we have such a great time building them! Then all year long when we visit, we munch on the little treats from the basket.

What's your favorite creative gift to give?

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On Being a Work At Home Mom...and Marriage

A post has been floating around the mom forums lately titled "Being a Stay-at-Home Parent is a Luxury...for Your Spouse" and it's lit the fire in me to write the post about what it's like to both stay at home and work.

If you don't know; I work from home four days per week and go into the office one day per week. I truly have the best of both worlds because I am able to be home and experience every first that our son experiences and still take a day to put on my career hat and slip out the door without being covered in scrambled egg mush.

My husband works a traditional office job away from home full time. On my days in the office, one of our moms spends the day with our son.

A few weeks ago, both grandmas were on vacation and Hubs had to work from home while I went into the office for the day.

Typically on my day in the office, I rush home after work to pick up our son or get dinner on the table if one of the grandmas is dropping him off. On this day, I had no reason to rush home so I went out after work to run some errands.

About 10 minutes from when I would normally be home from work Hubs called me in a desperate tone, "Where are you? When will you be home?"

During the day he had posted a status claiming that while he never considered it easy for me to work at home and raise our son, he had no idea how truly difficult it was until he had to do it himself.

While on the phone with him I chuckled, "So...what's for dinner?" and he said (while our son crashed through the house in the background), "I don't...I don't know. I can't...We're going out. I'm done."

I can try to say how I feel at the end of the day in so many words but having him experience it was such a huge sense of relief to me. Not because I wanted him to feel miserable, but because I wanted him to understand. I felt so alone having to take on the career world and the mom world myself I just wanted someone to say, "You're right. It is damn hard." When I heard his tone I felt a whole bucket of empathy and satisfaction, all at once.

Now I don't want anyone to misunderstand, my husband is a wonderful man. He has always been a stellar father but something about our experience in this "Life Swap" that day changed the way we both parented. We became so much more understanding of one another's needs and experiences.

Recently, he was feeling very fatigued. He said, "Gosh it's 9:30 and for the second night in a row I could just go to sleep right now. I'm so exhausted. What have I been doing so much that has wiped me out like this?!" and I laughed. "You're being a great dad." I told him, followed by, "That's how I feel every day."

Now when I'm ready to turn in at 9:30 he doesn't say, "Won't you stay up and watch this show with me?" instead, he nods in understanding and says, "Goodnight. I love you."

Every day I love that man more and the longer we are parents, the stronger our marriage grows.

Working is hard. Parenting is hard. Doing both is really hard. But knowing someone has felt what I'm feeling and is there to hold me up when I'm fumbling through it is the biggest blessing of all.

So let's all stop placing blame on who has it worse...or better. Life is just hard. But it's also really worth it. You're where you are because of the choices you've made. I'm so thankful because marrying that dude was my best choice ever. 

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